dare i make a controversial statement here 🧐 i dont think the way about it is to try to gate keep these things as sacred or "only for queer people". ofc there's a beauty in it for the original context of its creation and that needs to be respected however i don't think that straight people engaging with queer media is indicative that they don't care or want to erase it in some way. i think that this frustration should rather be more emphasised at the fact that there's a lack of music for queer people in the first place. how hard it is for these artists to build a platform. you've touched on it obv, thankfully times are slowly changing and there's more media out there. i can sympathise from personal experience in other facets of my identity with how i wish people can truly "get" how something isn't "just a cute song" to me but at the same time, i try to embrace the fact that they are also engaging with it in the first place.
idek what i'm getting at lol. i see your views as very valid but kinda curious if you get where i'm coming from too or if i might be missing something. 🩵
I understand your point of view and I do think that straight people should be engaging with queer media in order to normalize it but what irks me is their inability to view it as inherently queer, you can listen to Gigi Perez and Chappell roan but to dedicate a song that talks about sapphic love to your boyfriend is what gets me. You’re right there should be more queer media but sadly there isn’t nearly enough so when they have millions of songs to choose from, some of which are decades old, and still actively CHOOSE, bcuz it is a choice, to use queer songs that is what gets under my skin. Straight people should by all means engage with queer media in order to educate and understand our lived experience I love sharing queer media with my straight friends and discussing it but they would never turn around and dedicate to men.
obviously it's a different story when people try to change pronouns or adapt queer media to straight wash it. that part i completely agree with as nauseating and unkind. forgot to mention that lol
such a good article! the part where you touched on the imbalance between straight and lesbian art is so important. bc when they get criticized for it, the response is always like: 1.) presumption that we're both equal in this situation when hegemony exists and 2.) directly comparing straight art that we queer, to queer art they straighten, like "you lesbians do it too!". both of those are infuriating because it's just such a casual way to step on the feelings of others and silently get to ignore how we're suppressed in society. seeing you break that into little pieces by talking about cultural and religious powers already favoring straights was perfect. that thing they do can really escalate and I've seen examples of straight ppl saying variations of "if it's ok to write a story where a woman stops dating men to find her true happiness in women, then it's fair to write one where a former lesbian decides to date men". they don't even respect the imbalance between those two things. the first is liberating and the other is a perversion. everything in our lives is a voice telling us to stay away from loving women and march toward men, and that equivocation is one more voice. queer art has a voice shouting to us, trying to wake up our soul, see past the straight voices into our inner truth. for those of us who know ourselves, it's a drink of water in a desert. but whether it's anti-lesbian song lyrics to the anti-lesbian fiction there's a droplet of that straight voice, watering down the queer voice in the art.
my problem isn't when straight ppl engage with lesbian art in good faith. it's that they don't carry lesbians and lesbianism or anything queer with them in their hearts while engaging. they're not earnest in recognizing it for what is, who it's for, what messages it really speaks. it's that they don't have any queer guidance or queer heart in those moments, so everything is filtered back into a "corrected" straight lens. when the tik tok girl you mentioned changed those lyrics, she did it because she thought she was expressing the same things as the original piece, just with the genders swapped. they treat swapping genders like nothing of significance has changed, like men and women are easily fungible when even straight hegemony says the opposite under penalty of violence. but it does matter if you change the genders. queer art expresses fundamentally QUEER FEELINGS. by straightening it out, they have also changed the content of the feelings but still present it in the form of the original queer art as though it's fine, as though nothing is fundamentally different. it's very close to something like lying. they're being inauthentic people with the way they engage queer art. their bad faith makes my inner lesbian voice small
when queer people queer straight art, it adds a depth of humanity for us to relate with. we're not powerful enough for our narrative to take over and replace the straight one anyway. when straight people straighten queer art, it guts the revolutionary and liberating spirit out of it. they have the numbers and systemic backing to water down the things that light a fire in us.
long comment cause this article lit a fire in my heart
oh my god yes I couldn't agree more!!! it's literally just homophobic to take away from our lived experiences by acting like our songs and culture can possibly fit them. the last line of this — 'love persevering through decades of oppression' — is absolutely wonderful btw
Honestly, they sound tone def and ignorant which is basically homophobic so your totally right. It makes queer artists and leaders have to work that much harder and take more shit at the frontlines.
I saw Girl in Red the other day with Gigi Perez opening (ABSOLUTELY phenomenal, both of them) and my friends and I had to watch a straight couple in front of us kiss and cuddle the whole time.. this essay sums up EXACTLY how I felt about it.. It didn’t ruin the show by any means (Girl in red and Gigi both gave me chills and my gosh it was so so special 🥹) but trying to watch and listen to something so sacred to us over their veryyy heterosexual PDA trulyyy irked me and my fellow Lesbian friends.. this essay sums up what I haven’t been able to put into words myself. Thank you
dare i make a controversial statement here 🧐 i dont think the way about it is to try to gate keep these things as sacred or "only for queer people". ofc there's a beauty in it for the original context of its creation and that needs to be respected however i don't think that straight people engaging with queer media is indicative that they don't care or want to erase it in some way. i think that this frustration should rather be more emphasised at the fact that there's a lack of music for queer people in the first place. how hard it is for these artists to build a platform. you've touched on it obv, thankfully times are slowly changing and there's more media out there. i can sympathise from personal experience in other facets of my identity with how i wish people can truly "get" how something isn't "just a cute song" to me but at the same time, i try to embrace the fact that they are also engaging with it in the first place.
idek what i'm getting at lol. i see your views as very valid but kinda curious if you get where i'm coming from too or if i might be missing something. 🩵
I understand your point of view and I do think that straight people should be engaging with queer media in order to normalize it but what irks me is their inability to view it as inherently queer, you can listen to Gigi Perez and Chappell roan but to dedicate a song that talks about sapphic love to your boyfriend is what gets me. You’re right there should be more queer media but sadly there isn’t nearly enough so when they have millions of songs to choose from, some of which are decades old, and still actively CHOOSE, bcuz it is a choice, to use queer songs that is what gets under my skin. Straight people should by all means engage with queer media in order to educate and understand our lived experience I love sharing queer media with my straight friends and discussing it but they would never turn around and dedicate to men.
obviously it's a different story when people try to change pronouns or adapt queer media to straight wash it. that part i completely agree with as nauseating and unkind. forgot to mention that lol
such a good article! the part where you touched on the imbalance between straight and lesbian art is so important. bc when they get criticized for it, the response is always like: 1.) presumption that we're both equal in this situation when hegemony exists and 2.) directly comparing straight art that we queer, to queer art they straighten, like "you lesbians do it too!". both of those are infuriating because it's just such a casual way to step on the feelings of others and silently get to ignore how we're suppressed in society. seeing you break that into little pieces by talking about cultural and religious powers already favoring straights was perfect. that thing they do can really escalate and I've seen examples of straight ppl saying variations of "if it's ok to write a story where a woman stops dating men to find her true happiness in women, then it's fair to write one where a former lesbian decides to date men". they don't even respect the imbalance between those two things. the first is liberating and the other is a perversion. everything in our lives is a voice telling us to stay away from loving women and march toward men, and that equivocation is one more voice. queer art has a voice shouting to us, trying to wake up our soul, see past the straight voices into our inner truth. for those of us who know ourselves, it's a drink of water in a desert. but whether it's anti-lesbian song lyrics to the anti-lesbian fiction there's a droplet of that straight voice, watering down the queer voice in the art.
my problem isn't when straight ppl engage with lesbian art in good faith. it's that they don't carry lesbians and lesbianism or anything queer with them in their hearts while engaging. they're not earnest in recognizing it for what is, who it's for, what messages it really speaks. it's that they don't have any queer guidance or queer heart in those moments, so everything is filtered back into a "corrected" straight lens. when the tik tok girl you mentioned changed those lyrics, she did it because she thought she was expressing the same things as the original piece, just with the genders swapped. they treat swapping genders like nothing of significance has changed, like men and women are easily fungible when even straight hegemony says the opposite under penalty of violence. but it does matter if you change the genders. queer art expresses fundamentally QUEER FEELINGS. by straightening it out, they have also changed the content of the feelings but still present it in the form of the original queer art as though it's fine, as though nothing is fundamentally different. it's very close to something like lying. they're being inauthentic people with the way they engage queer art. their bad faith makes my inner lesbian voice small
when queer people queer straight art, it adds a depth of humanity for us to relate with. we're not powerful enough for our narrative to take over and replace the straight one anyway. when straight people straighten queer art, it guts the revolutionary and liberating spirit out of it. they have the numbers and systemic backing to water down the things that light a fire in us.
long comment cause this article lit a fire in my heart
thank you for your comment, the whole idea about “straightening” out queer media was a perspective i rlly enjoyed you expressed it so well!
thank you that makes me happy!
it’d be lovely to read your thoughts that if you decide to write on it
such a good comment, i agree with it so much!
oh my god yes I couldn't agree more!!! it's literally just homophobic to take away from our lived experiences by acting like our songs and culture can possibly fit them. the last line of this — 'love persevering through decades of oppression' — is absolutely wonderful btw
thank you!! im so glad you enjoyed it!!
Honestly, they sound tone def and ignorant which is basically homophobic so your totally right. It makes queer artists and leaders have to work that much harder and take more shit at the frontlines.
I saw Girl in Red the other day with Gigi Perez opening (ABSOLUTELY phenomenal, both of them) and my friends and I had to watch a straight couple in front of us kiss and cuddle the whole time.. this essay sums up EXACTLY how I felt about it.. It didn’t ruin the show by any means (Girl in red and Gigi both gave me chills and my gosh it was so so special 🥹) but trying to watch and listen to something so sacred to us over their veryyy heterosexual PDA trulyyy irked me and my fellow Lesbian friends.. this essay sums up what I haven’t been able to put into words myself. Thank you
i can imagine how frustrating it felt to try to enjoy such a monumental experience while that was happening
It was.. we had a beautiful time regardless, but of course in my little poetess lesbian brain it felt quite symbolic in a very sad way..
When people try to change the “I don’t believe in god” line that ENRAGES ME